This section is

DISTURBANCE!

 

EROTICA
IRREVERENCE
CHOCOLATES & FLOWERS
CHILDRENS
THE HEALING PROCESS
HUMOUR

 

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WELCOME TO

'MIND DISTURBANCE'

 

 

Welcome to our famous Chizzel House of Mind Disturbance. Someone already had Hammer, and disturbance sounds better than horror. We thought we should have a butler like Lurch for the house, so we advertised and got one. So please no ‘disturbance’ from you, or Andy will sneak up behind you and catch you in a sack ... then, who knows? He may keep you in his wardrobe or in a cage.

 

Our graveyard (We got one from e Bay as B&Q’s Garden Dept was too expensive) is tended by the brother of an old friend of mine, a guy called Alan Stone, we called him Brick. He has a brother called Edward, who is a grave keeper in his local churchyard. We put a few gravestones in the shop to keep him happy. Here is a short ballad about him:

 


 


The Ballad of Edward Stone

His name was Edward Stone
And he had walked over many a bone
As he tended lovingly to each grave
He was very, very brave

Because ...

He weeded them at night
When the owls and bats took flight (or fright?)
He saw many a strange dark figure
Which pulled his panic trigger

Edward hid inside the church
Let in by doorman, the well weird Andy Lurch
He sat in a pew and for God’s protection did pray
Until the saving light of the divine one’s next day

 


But Edward liked some mushroom
Which caused his influenced imagination to bloom
The dark foreboding figures he saw
Only in his mind did they up-show.

Don’t worry

There’s no such thing as walking dead
It’s nice to know that when in your bed
The scariest thing of which I can think
Is when the relative in the coffin opens eyes and at ‘you’ does wink

Then it immediately closes its eyes
And returns to being dead
After making your heart race
And filling you with dread

But ... if you do, do a graveyard shift
And a dark figure staggers towards you ...
RUN!

 


 

It's amazing what you can find in graveyards.

 

 


 

Found in a car boot sale, it looks remarkably like Edward Stone

 

Now our books...

 

 

Mary Shelly and Bram Stoker, two great icons who had the human ability ‘afforded’ to some ... the ability to love what they did. Writing though, to both of them was a beloved hobby. Mary Shelley was a maker of things such as tissue boxes, from seashells, so she was self employed and wasn’t normal because she didn’t have a proper job. Her seafront shop was called Shelly’s Shelly Stuff.

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These three stories have some awful bits in them. The first one about the zombies has some good parts too, meaning good in the sense of ‘nice’, which is a bit of a change for zombies which tend to go around eating people alive. The second story which features cuckoos is what people might call human nature amplified, so is pretty horrible. The third is the dark the darker side of human nature.

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This is a respectful tribute to the recently passed British horror author, the great, the well loved James Herbert. The four short stories have been written down by Frankie who channels the souls of who were great unknown British horror writers, James Turbot and Stephen Cling.

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Title: Absurd Tales From The NHS

 

 

 

The NHS in Britain is in crisis, so this should be an interesting read for those who like hospital dramas. I'm an outsider, but the people from the NHS who have read it have said ... "Too close for comfort." Some from other walks of life have said ... "Well that sounds about true."
It's a little gory in places, but what would you expect from a building full of knives and stuff?
The second story actually is a solution to reclaim occupied beds, because there is a drastic bed shortage.


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Title: A Hand in Horror

(Word Count 9101)

FREE!



Two British horror writers, Stephen Cling and James Turbot decide to put pen to paper, and re write some of the stories of the world’s two great horror writers i.e. Stephen King, and James Herbert ... plus a couple of their own masterworks too. This selfless act is to ‘teach’ their heroes to be even better in their field.
Very kind of them. Great horror, which will be even greater when Hammer get hold of the book. HINT HINT!

A Testimonial

I am a big fan of both Stephen King and James Herbert, so I was Intrigued enough to read, Stephen Cling and James Turbot!!! I thoroughly enjoyed the stories and can't wait for more!! I downloaded the book onto my e reader!
 
Thanks for an enjoyable evening! (I read It all at once, could'nt put It down)
 
Jill Adair

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Title: The Even Thinner Collection

This is the first collection from Stephen Cling’s Chizzel House of Horror, the superior cousin to Hammer. In his last book, which he shared with James Turbot, Cling gave such delights as Coo Joe, and Miserly ...written to help Stephen King improve, get richer, and build a bigger fan base. This time he gives you Even Thinner and Firestarter Meets ... can’t tell you yet.

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